lets just be clear, if you spend the time baking a cake/cookies/brownies, you can eat as many of them as you want and the calories don’t count. you made those calories. you’re their god.
disclaimer: this does not apply to children you have made
I can’t decide whether to get a “who unfollowed me” app or bash myself in the face with my high school year book several times a day.
before mum left for work she handed me this lemon and told me to make sure it doesn’t cause any mischief while she is out. i am to groom him twice a day and feed him every 3 hours. then we shall play boggle and i’ll let him win out of pity. he’ll notice the sparkle in my eyes and fall in love with me. i will be mesmerised by his beautiful zesty scent and fall in love with him. at the end of the day i will get down on one knee and confess my undying love for him and ask him for his hand in marriage. we are to be wed on the ides of april. our honeymoon will be wild and carnal.
i shall fall pregnant and 9 months later will give birth to a beautiful lemon daughter. i will name her clarissa. throughout her teen years she will face many challenges. no one will want to date her because she is a lemon. no one will invite her to their sweet 16 because she is a lemon. no girl wants to change in front of her in the PE change rooms because she is a lemon.
clarissa will eventually lose her fucking lemon mind and jump into a blender. i will be devastated by this. i will cry many tears. then, my lemon husband will leave me out of confusion and grief. he’ll find some foreign woman here on a visitor’s visa and fuck her brains out. he’ll then realise that the only human woman who has ever satisfied his citrus seeds is me, and he will come back to me. i will make him work to earn my respect again. we will make sweet sweet love under the orange tree in my backyard. he’ll tell me he loves me and i’ll tell him i love him, and then we’ll grow old together and sit on the porch every morning, watching the sun rise.what
i just read lemon fan fiction
Is Earth the only living needle in this haystack of planets?
We live in one of a hundred billion of galaxies, each with hundreds of billions of stars. And now, thanks to modern astronomy, we know that the Milky Way is home to perhaps a hundred billion planets! In the past two decades, these exoplanet discoveries have spawned new questions about our universe, and if there might be another Earth, or other life, somewhere out there.
In part one of my two-part series on exoplanets, we’ll look at how astronomers find exoplanets, and what it means to call them Earth-like. We also trace the history of planetary science back three thousand years and examine Earth’s changing status in the cosmos.
We were once the center of the universe, and now Earth is just another rock in the sky. What does that mean for us?
If I look up “carrot” in the dictionary, most people will acknowledge I do not know all there is to know about carrots and if I truly want to understand carrots, I should probably pick up a horticultural text book. We know that legal and medical terms are going to be, at best, simplistically represented and know we need to find a lawyer or a doctor if we want to know more. Anyone deciding to base their argument on, say, a philosophical concept or term using the dictionary is going to be laughed at at best, or automatically lose whatever argument they’re trying to make at least.
Yet the minute we move into a social justice framework, the ultimate authority changes. We don’t need lived experience, we don’t need experts who have examined centuries of social disparities and discrimination, we don’t need societal context. We don’t need sociology or history – no, we have THE DICTIONARY! That ultimate tome of oracular insight, the last word on any debate!
It’s patently ridiculous and you can see that by applying it to any other field of knowledge. But the privileged will continually trot out simplistic, twitter-style dictionary definitions as if they are the last word and the ultimate authority. No-one would drag out the dictionary to debate science with a scientist. But they’re more than willing to trot out a dictionary definition of racism over any sociological analysis. A dictionary is not the ultimate authority - they’re a rough guide for you to discover the simple meaning of words you’ve never heard before – not an ultimate definition of what the word means and all its contexts.
is it true that girls have to be careful when they take baths because their vaginas can like swallow water or something and then get infected and then they can die or is that just a myth
did you take sex ed in texas
let me just say that i live in texas and in my sexual education a girl asked what the clitoris was and the teacher told her that it didn’t exist.
When you’re playing Apples to Apples and whoever is judging picks the literal and politically correct answer.
A girl draw a series of self-portraits after she’d taken LSD
After 15 minutes
1 hour and 45 minutes
2 hours and 15 minutes
3 and a haf hours
4 hours and 45 minutes
6 hours and 45 minutes
8 hours and 45 minutes
9 and a half hours
so when you take LSD you become a goddess
Went to go grab a beer, came back to this… Majestic as fuck.